Ranking the Chicago Cubs Top-10 nicknames of all-time

Player’s weekend is close at hand, and the nicknames have all been released, but who stands among the greatest nicknames in Chicago Cubs history?

If there’s one thing that the Chicago Cubs haven’t lacked over their long, storied history, it’s the bevy of terrific nicknames. They range from iconic, like Fergie and Ryno, to clever, like The Crime Dog and El Mago.

To rank all of these nicknames would be impossible, so I’m limiting the list to only ten entries. I’ve also set up several parameters to separate the best from the rest (in my opinion).

To start, I’m going to focus around nicknames that aren’t made from the player’s actual name. Unless it’s a unique playoff of their name or they have an interesting title (i.e., Grandpa Rossy). While this does leave off the likes of Fergie Jenkins and Mark Grace, it allows for all of the unique nicknames to shine through.

Second, I’m disregarding players who have only played a single year or less for the team. This leaves out the likes of Goose Gossage and Aroldis Chapman (as much as I love the nickname Cuban Missile), but it narrows the list down to the more tenured Chicago Cubs.

Finally, though this is more just to determine the order, I’ll give a bit more credit to nicknames that fit the kind of player the person was. With all of that out of the way, let’s take a look back at some of the greatest Chicago Cubs nicknames of all time.

9. Kyle “The Professor” Hendricks: 2014 – Present.

It wouldn’t be proper to talk about Maddux without also mentioning a player many consider to be his modern-day counterpart. Kyle Hendricks, known as “The Professor,” excels with his soft-tossing prowess, schooling batters with his precise pitch placement.

As a nickname, “The Professor” works on multiple levels for Hendricks, considering his background and his style of pitching. It also allows for various school-related jokes which I am very much a fan of.

Hendricks graduated from Dartmouth with a degree in economics and was, by all accounts in an article by Bill Platt, an excellent, committed student as well as a tutor. He passed up an opportunity to join the Angels in the 2008 draft to attend Dartmouth and further his education.

The other reason he has the nickname “The Professor” is because of his style of precision pitching which leaves batters fooled. His low velocity leaves him with little room for error, and because of it, he’s one of the best pitchers at getting strikes on the borders.

I enjoy this nickname simply because it gets better the more you know about Hendricks and the kind of person he was before joining the Chicago Cubs. But it still makes sense even as a casual fan. With his calm, collected demeanor, he also has the appearance of a college professor, which is just too perfect.

8. Ernie “Mr. Cub” Banks: 1953 – 1971.

It was tough not to put “Mr. Cub” higher on the list of fantastic nicknames. But there is one thing that holds this one back: a lot of teams have a player with the Mr. (insert team name here) nickname. The Padres have Tony Gwynn, the Tigers have Al Kaline, and the Cardinals have Red Schoendienst.

Still, Ernie Banks was such a deserving recipient of the name “Mr. Cub” that he had to be on here somewhere. He spent each of his 19 seasons on the Northside and compiled a monstrous track record there.

Throughout his career, Banks earned 14 All-Star nods, two MVPs, and a Gold Glove all while donning Cubbie blue and a wide, infectious smile. In his 1958 MVP season, he led the league in home runs, RBIs, slugging, total bases, at-bats, and games played, all while recording a stunning 155 OPS+.

What truly made Banks special and allowed him to embody the nickname of Mr. Cub, however, was his friendly nature that flourished well in the “Friendly Confines.” Even after his playing career, he continued to come back to Wrigley to meet the fans and sing the seventh-inning stretch, cementing himself as a fixture of the Cubs organization.

Banks embodied what it means to be a Chicago Cub, and his legacy lives on in Chicago as not just an all-time great player, but an all-time great personality. No matter who comes along in the Cubs organization, Banks will forever be recognized as Mr. Cub.

7. Rick “The Red Baron” Sutcliffe: 1984 – 1991.

As a pitcher, the nickname “The Red Baron” gives the impression that you’re about to cut down opposing batters like an ace fighter pilot cuts down enemy airplanes. Rick Sutcliffe didn’t exactly have the highest strikeout numbers, but he did enjoy a good amount of success in his own right.

1984 marked Sutcliffe’s only Cy Young season after a mid-season trade to the Chicago Cubs from the Indians. What had been a miserable season for the righty changed to a magical season where he improved his ERA+ from 80 to 144 and won 16 of the 20 games he started in Chicago.

While he’s not in Cooperstown, Sutcliffe put together a solid career, winning Rookie of the Year with the Dodgers and totaling three All-Star appearances. He ended his career with a 97 ERA+ and a total of 1,679 strikeouts.

As for his nickname, Sutcliffe owes Cubs broadcasting legend Harry Caray for coming up with the moniker after noting his auburn hair. He also has the legend to thank for luring him back to Chicago after he became a free agent after his Cy Young season.

It’s an intimidating nickname which implies the presence of a grizzled, tactical veteran capable of taking down other skilled ballplayers and I love it. After all, when you’re being compared to a mythical WWI fighter pilot, you’re probably doing something right.

6. Fred “The Crime Dog” McGriff: 2001 – 2002.

Fred McGriff only played for one and a partial season for the Cubs at the back end of his career, but I don’t care. If nobody called McGriff “The Crime Dog” it would be one of the biggest misses in baseball history.

By the time he came to the Chicago Cubs, McGriff had already tallied up a good portion of his borderline Hall of Fame career, tallying five All-Star game appearances, an All-Star game MVP, two Silver Sluggers, and several votes for MVP. Even as a Cub, he still put up an impressive slash line, hitting a total of 49 home runs while with the organization.

McGriff ended his career only seven home runs shy of 500, which would have put him among only 27 other hitters in baseball history. He finished with an impressive slash line of .284/.377/.509, also leaving him just shy of the magical .300/.400/.500 mark.

Now, it can be debated whether or not McGriff belongs in Cooperstown, but the greatness of his nickname can not be argued. Referencing the fictional dog McGruff, who educated kids on how to stay safe and handle any criminal situations, the nickname practically presented itself on a silver platter for the slugger.

For the time McGriff played, this was a very apt nickname that also had a bit of an intimidating edge to it. If I were pitching against McGriff, I’d be afraid he’d take a bite out of my fastball and send it over the fence.

5. Gary “The Sarge” Matthews Sr: 1984 – 1987.

When you think back to the Cubs’ wild 1984 season, names like the previously mentioned Sutcliffe and Ryne Sandberg get brought up as some of the critical pieces to that team. It would be easy then to overlook the impact of the team’s veteran outfielder: “The Sarge.”

Gary Matthews may very well go down as one of the most underrated Chicago Cubs players of all time, but that’s a list for a different day. Matthews had a somewhat short tenure with the team as well, but he made the most out of it, particularly in the 1984 season.

Matthews finished fifth in MVP voting in 1984, hitting for a respectable 129 OPS+ and being a prolific on-base guy. He led the league with a .410 on-base percentage, providing support for the other hitters in the team’s lineup.

As a nickname, “The Sarge” is one that you can only truly earn if you’re a competent, inspiring leader willing to take charge for your team. Matthews saw it as his job to lead by example and take charge when it came to manufacturing runs for the Chicago Cubs.

I love the nickname and believe that earning such a moniker can help to motivate teammates looking for a veteran presence to guide them and demonstrate how to play the game of baseball with as much fire as possible. Matthews was a sort of spark plug for the team, and I can’t imagine the challenge pitchers faced knowing “The Sarge” was about to kick things off for his squad.

4. Mitch “Wild Thing” Williams: 1989 – 1990.

Chicago Cubs Mitch Williams’s delivery is pretty wild. Frankly though, being called “Wild Thing” as a pitcher is probably on the shortlist of things you’d rather not be called.

If anyone had truly earned that nickname, however, it was Williams who basically fell down violently with each pitch. The craziest thing, however, is that he had a reasonably successful career in spite of it.

In 1989, Williams’s best year with the Chicago Cubs, he posted a 138 ERA+ and made his first and only All-Star appearance. He also managed to record 36 saves, good enough to garner him a tenth place finish in MVP voting and ninth in Cy Young voting.

The one issue Williams struggled with over his career, however, was a high walk rate, further contributing to his status as “Wild Thing.” He ended with a career walk rate of 7.1 per nine innings, which would be pretty dreadful if it weren’t for his 8.6 strikeouts per nine innings.

This nickname is nearly perfect in my eyes. It describes exactly how Williams pitches both from an analytical and visual standpoint while still sounding pretty cool.

Like I said earlier, it’s probably on the shortlist of things most pitchers would prefer not to be called. It’s the kind of nickname that incites less fear of being dominated and more fear of getting a ball to the ribs on accident.

3. Javier “El Mago” Baez: 2014 – Present

Okay, I’ll admit, I’m incredibly biased on this one, but I love this nickname. Javier Baez is a magical infielder to watch both on offense and defense, and no nickname fits him better than “El Mago (The Magician).”

At the plate, Baez is very much the definition of a free swinger, striking out 676 times and only walking 116 times in his young career. Somehow, he manages to make a lot of contact on balls outside the zone, getting infield hits or, in one instance, throwing his bat at a ball to make it go over the infielders’ heads.

Of course, that’s nothing compared to his human highlight reel level of defense. While Baez still makes his fair share of errors (14 at shortstop this year), his range and athleticism allow him to make plays on balls others may not, allowing him to make some incredible plays.

Finally, Baez’s baserunning magic tricks include fooling everyone in the stadium into thinking he’s out until the replay confirms otherwise and stealing home off of pick-off throws. For all the magic he does with his crazy swim move, he gets a ton of success from just being an aggressive player that demands your attention.

This is such a good nickname, and it certainly seems as if mystical powers beyond our control are at play when Baez does something. He does things that seem impossible.

2. Andre “The Hawk” Dawson: 1987 – 1992

When being compared to animals, I have to imagine hawks are pretty high up on the list for what professional baseball players would like to be called. Andre Dawson earned the nickname for the Chicago Cubs and definitely deserved it.

“The Hawk” made an impact from the second he arrived in Chicago, earning five straight All-Star appearances and an MVP in 1987 as well as a couple of Gold Gloves and a Silver Slugger. For his career, Dawson hit for a 119 OPS+ and played stellar defense in the outfield, compiling a lifetime .983 fielding percentage.

Dawson also racked up a bevy of All-Star, and Gold Glove nods as part of the Montreal Expos, playing a pivotal role for their organization before coming to Chicago. It was there that he won his Rookie of the Year award in 1977 with 19 home runs and a solid .282/.326/.474 slash line.

Dawson earned his nickname playing little league when his uncle noted the young player’s incredible plate vision. Aside from that, his nasty scowl as he looked for a pitch at the plate looked reminiscent of a predator hunting his prey.

What makes “The Hawk” such a good nickname is its simplicity combined with the implications it had for Dawson at the plate. While Dawson didn’t necessarily have the best eye in the majors (he only recorded 589 walks and punched out 1,509 times), he still was a significant threat to pitchers throughout the ’70s, ’80s, and early ’90s.

It’s such an intimidating nickname paired with his imposing presence at-bat and versatility in the outfield. I really couldn’t justify putting such an iconic nickname any lower.

1. Mordecai “Three Finger” Brown: 1904 – 1912, 1916.

Picking the top nickname for this list is difficult, and I’m probably going to change my mind about the position of a lot of these ten days from now. “Three Finger,” however, has always stuck out to me.

Mordecai Brown was part of one of the greatest eras of Chicago Cubs baseball from a playoff success perspective, being an integral part of the 1907 and 1908 Cubs who won back-to-back World Series. Brown’s career ERA+ sits at an impressive 139, but his 1906 seasons stands as one of his most remarkable feats.

Even among Deadball Era pitchers, Brown managed to pitch to an eye-popping 253(!) ERA+ with a 2.08 FIP and 0.934 WHIP, which all led the league. He also managed to lead the league in shutouts with nine.

All of this said we’re here for the nickname. How did Mordecai Brown become the famous “Three Finger” Brown?

Brown got his nickname from his childhood clumsiness. While he was only cut down to four an a half fingers, Brown technically only had three viable fingers after he accidentally lost part of his right index finger in some farming equipment and permanently disabled his little finger after falling and breaking it.

The nickname “Three Finger” has a sort of mythical quality to it, just as “Babe,” “Teddy Ballgame,” or “The Say-Hey Kid” does. It’s a nickname associated with greatness that was granted by the disfigurement that gave Brown said nickname in the first place.

It’s such an interesting nickname to me because it promotes discussion of one of the greatest sports on the planet and one of it’s greatest legends. Plus, like all good nicknames, it sounds pretty darn cool.